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skycloudnz what do you think to this.

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Author Topic: skycloudnz what do you think to this.  (Read 375 times)
Cool Hand
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Posts: 104

« on: February 13, 2009, 07:57:51 am »
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this is my best poem.tell me what yoiu think.
i have spelt checked mos of it.

She wanted me
Oh she wanted me,
I walked into her
Striking eyes,
She flirted with everyone,
While still looking at me,
She wiggled.she pranced,
She smouldered.

We danced,
Exchanged scents,
Perspirations mingled,
Lips parted for
A probing French Kiss,
"You can have me anytime"
She wispered,your nice.

Id had enough of the chase
Went to bed,
Rolled a joint,
striped naked,
And stood gazing
at the Pale moon Rising.
Just like me.

I waited .
i knew she would come,
door tapped.
she peeped inside,
smelt my smoke,
and said slyly:
ill have some of that!
And some of you
for my dessert!!
Not a problem" said I.
As I ran for
the unlocked door
Forgetting I was naked
And at half mast,

Door locked.
no Formalities.
Mini skirt. over Her head,
Burying my head.
Tasted sweet.un washed,
Back arched,
Legs eagle spread,
she took me.
she took me,
my lance buried ,
in her cold cement,
like Excalibur'
One thrust.
She took me.

I took Her,in the shower,
Then we lit a fire,
Of hidden desires,
We didnt sleep till
Sun up,till sunrise.
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« Reply #1 on: February 22, 2009, 04:27:28 pm »
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Full of images that pull no punches. I like the idea of walking into her eyes. It leads into penetrating the being- the perspective of the other. Read D.H. Lawrence for more ideas.
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