In Search of Death

[caskur]

In Search of Death


GREGORY A. FREEMAN | Jan 23, 2003



Carlos nonchalantly asks whether his drink was made with whole or skim milk. He takes a moment to slurp on his grande Caffe Mocha in a crowded Starbucks, and then he gets back to explaining how much he wants HIV, the virus that causes AIDS. His eyes light up as he says that the actual moment of transmission, the instant he gets HIV, will be "the most erotic thing I can imagine." He seems like a typical thirty-two-year-old man, but, in fact, he has a secret life. Carlos is chasing the bug.
"I know what the risks are, and I know that putting myself in this situation is like putting a gun to my head," he says. Some of that mountain music that's so popular is playing, making the moment even more surreal as a Southern voice sings, "Keep on the sunny side of life" behind Carlos. "But I think it turns the other guy on to know that I'm negative and that they're bringing me into the brotherhood. That gets me off, too."

I met Carlos in New York's Greenwich Village, the neighborhood where he usually hangs out. He is tall, with a large build, and plenty of gay men find him attractive. His longish, curly-wavy hair is jet-black with golden highlights, and his face is soft and just a bit feminine. He has a very appealing smile and laugh, and he's a funny guy sometimes. The conversation veers from the banal -- his fascination with the reality show The Amazing Race -- to his desire for HIV. Carlos' tone never changes when switching from one topic to the other.

When asked whether he is prepared to live with HIV after that "erotic" moment, Carlos dismisses living with HIV as a minor annoyance. Like most bug chasers, he has the impression that the virus just isn't such a big deal anymore: "It's like living with diabetes. You take a few pills and get on with your life." Carlos spends the afternoon continually calling a man named Richard, someone he met on the Internet. They met on barebackcity.com about a year ago, while Carlos was still with his boyfriend. That boyfriend left because Carlos was having sex with other men and because he was interested in barebacking -- the practice of having sex without a condom. Carlos and Richard are arranging a "date" for later that day.


FULL STORY: http://www.rollingstone.com/news/story/5939950/bug_chasers

I think these people need to be rounded up and exiled to a forgotten Pacific Ocean somewhere.

[arete]

I saw a story on that & the dude did get full blown aids &
realized how stupid he was.  He said it was like pure evil
calling his name and he just couldn't resist.  He would go
into really seedy clubs and do the deadliest, sickest looking
men he could find.  It's sad the way some are fooled by the
lies of the enemy.  I'm sure we have all been sucked into
a lie of the enemy however small it might have been.

Watch out.

 

[arete]

I really need an angel emotey since
it is my trademark.  This lil devil just might
change my whole 'tude.

[arete]

   Hi CC.  I know you're lurking about
taking notes.  Don't try to deny.

[caskur]

I really need an angel emotey since
it is my trademark.  This lil devil just might
change my whole 'tude.

Just ask and ye shall receive.

  Hi CC.  I know you're lurking about
taking notes.  Don't try to deny.

What is a CC?

[arete]

Ohhhh that's awesome, now I just
need to know how to get my pictures in
here. 

ty

[caskur]

Ohhhh that's awesome, now I just
need to know how to get my pictures in
here. 

ty

Choose the quote function on  my post with the angel. That is up on top of my post in the right hand corner. A post will load up and you will see the codes.

When that quote loads into your post, check out what you see. You should see this;





You should see an URL address in image tags. Just copy my URL of the angel (which is that URL highlighted in red) by highlighting with your mouse, saving it to copy by left clicking it when a box pops up and asks you to and then paste by left clicking the paste.....

try it now.


Post in member gallery too. Try and load it there. I might try that. I might put all the good emoties in the gallery so posters can use them.

Post from photobucket or imageshack. Do you know how to do that?

[arete]

[arete]

ohhhh WOW, u are a great teacher!  If anyone
else had explained that I woulda been lost and gave
up. 

[caskur™]

ohhhh WOW, u are a great teacher!  If anyone
else had explained that I woulda been lost and gave
up. 

Don't lie. That explanation was convoluted.



What tha???

H

You should see an URL address in image tags. Just copy my URL of the angel (which is that URL highlighted in red) by highlighting with your mouse, saving it to copy by left clicking it when a box pops up and asks you to and then paste by left clicking the paste.....

[arete]

Well when most people try to explain something
they usually leave out important steps.  He covered
it all and I completed the task.  YIPPEEEEEEEEE!

Proof is in the puddin', babydoll.

[arete]

Bad's gonna be pissed
with this woodgrain stuff.

[caskur™]

Bad's gonna be pissed
with this woodgrain stuff.

I'm gonna change it, don't worry.