Message #3939

[caskur™]

Best


Pedro and Maria got married. Pedro was a "man about town" so to speak, but Maria was very naive and uninformed about the birds and the bees.

Pedro was a poor working man and could not afford to take time off for a honeymoon. So, that night they retired to his little shack. When Pedro was undressing Maria said, "Oh Pedro, what is that?"

Pedro being very quick thinking said, "Maria, I am the only man in the world with one of these." And, then, he proceeded to show her what it was for, and Maria was happy.

The next morning Pedro went off to work as usual. When he returned home that evening, Maria was on the front porch obviously upset about something.
 
"Pedro, you told me that you were the only man in the world with one of those, and I saw Gonzalez the gardener changing his clothes behind the shed, and he had one, too."

Thinking fast, Pedro said, "Oh, Maria, Gonzalez is my very best friend. I had two of them so I gave him one. He is the only other man in the world with one of those."

Maria being very stupid accepted his answer and they did their thing again that night.

Pedro went off to work again the next morning and when he returned home, Maria was very upset, stamping her foot on the porch.

Pedro said, "Maria, what is the matter now?"

"Pedro, you gave Gonzalez the best one!"


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Control over their wife


There were three guys talking in the pub.
 
  Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet.
 
  After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, "Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?".
 
  The third fellow says "I'll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees."
 
  The first two guys were amazed. "What happened then?" they asked.
 
  He replied, "She said, 'get out from under the bed and fight like a man'."


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Fathers Intelligence


A little boy went up to his father and asked: "Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?"
 
  The father replied, "Well son, you must have got it from your mother, because I still have mine."


 
Calling with Pet Names

A man was invited for dinner at a friend's house. Every time the host needed something, he preceded his request to his wife by calling her "My Love", "Darling", "Sweetheart", etc., etc.
 
  His friend looked at him and said, "That's really nice after all of these years you've been married to keep saying those little pet names."
 
  The host said, "Well, honestly, I've forgotten her name.